How to plan an Engagement Party

An engagement party is a wonderful way to celebrate your big news and bring your loved ones together ahead of the wedding. Traditionally, this event was an opportunity for both sets of parents and families to meet for the first time. Before the days of social media, it was also a way to announce your engagement to your wider circle of friends. Today, while you may have already shared your news online, an engagement party remains a special chance to celebrate in person and introduce your fiancé to friends and relatives.

Of course, there is no obligation to have an engagement party. Some couples prefer to skip it entirely, but if your families live far apart or you simply want an excuse to celebrate, it can be the perfect occasion.

Timing is important when planning an engagement party. Try to set a date within three months of the proposal, giving everyone enough notice without leaving it so late that attention shifts straight to the wedding. Ideally, the party should be comfortably spaced from the wedding date itself. With the average engagement lasting around 18 months, most couples have plenty of time to fit it in.

If you want to surprise everyone, you could even announce your engagement during another gathering, such as a summer barbecue or New Year’s Eve party. If you choose to do this, always let your parents and close family know beforehand to avoid causing offence. Never hijack someone else’s special occasion unless you have their blessing, as this can create tension instead of joy.

Guest lists for engagement parties can be tricky. As a general rule, anyone invited to your engagement party should also be invited to the wedding. If this won’t be the case—for example, if you’re planning a very small or overseas wedding—make this clear on the invitations to avoid disappointment.

The guest list can be as large or small as you like. Some couples opt for an intimate dinner with close family, while others prefer a bigger party with friends. Consider the purpose of the gathering—if it’s mainly to help the families get to know each other, a smaller event might work best.

When it comes to choosing a location, the options are endless. Many couples host their engagement party at home, in the garden, or in a local restaurant. Others hire a private function room in a pub, club, or hotel. Many venues offer free or low-cost room hire if guests purchase food and drinks on-site, which can help keep costs down.

Think about the kind of atmosphere you want: a relaxed barbecue, a cocktail evening, or a sit-down meal. Whatever you decide, make sure it feels different from your wedding day so that the big event still feels special.

Once the date and venue are set, it’s time to let your guests know. Sending engagement party invitations adds a personal and formal touch, ensuring everyone has the details to hand. Invitations should include:

• The names of the couple.

• The date, time, and venue.

• RSVP details.

• Any extra information, such as dress code, food and drink arrangements, or whether children are welcome.

Traditionally, the bride-to-be’s parents host the party, in which case the invitation wording should come from them and invite guests “in honour of” the couple. However, most modern engagement parties are organised by the couple themselves, so your invites can be more casual in tone.

An invitation is also the perfect place to communicate your wishes about gifts. Some couples prefer not to receive presents at the engagement stage, while others might ask for contributions toward the wedding fund or house items. Clear wording helps avoid confusion.

Engagement parties don’t need to be elaborate or expensive. Even a simple gathering can feel memorable with thoughtful details. Consider including:

• A short toast or speech to thank guests for coming.

• Sparkling wine or champagne for the traditional toast.

• A photo wall or display of your engagement story.

• Engagement thank you cards to thank everyone for coming after the party.

While an engagement party is exciting, it’s important that it doesn’t overshadow the wedding itself. Save the grand gestures for your big day, and keep your engagement party fun, informal, and stress-free. The focus should be on sharing your happiness and giving your families and friends a chance to celebrate together.